Long distance goes face to face

How do you make the transition from long distance to living with someone you've met and fallen in love with online? Many of us have done it and failed, just as many have made it a success.

I find myself looking at my relationship with DT and it is fantastic, I love him as much as ever and all you have to do is look in his eyes to know he loves me... probably more than I deserve. We are happy, yes we have moments when we drive each other crazy. Sometimes it's his doing, but honestly, it's just as often mine.

When we started down this road 1600 miles apart we both said that certain things made up the foundation of our relationship, who and what we are together and as individuals. Some were little things, like our nightly tuck-ins. While others were much bigger, like our pledge to always be open and honest. Sure there were a lot of other things, to always communicate, he made promises to always put me first, to always treat me like a lady, to always show me how he felt, flowers, poems, back rubs, cups of coffee...I made promises, to keep my head above water financially, to always work to be a better person, to keep up on the cooking and cleaning. To take care of him, make him lunch, to stop being so negative and to accept that I am worthy.

We are both failing in so many ways. But the one thing that is going to do us the most harm? Well, its two things actually. First, complacency. It seems that we are so comfortable together that we've stopped trying. Stopped wanting to be the best for each other. I've found myself forgetting to do the things he asks of me, like getting his lunch together, he, on the other hand, has dropped so many of those little things that meant so much to me. And I don't point these things out to him. I don't point them out because I don't want to be like his ex. She wanted to be wooed back, I want to be wooed, she missed the poetry, I miss the poetry. I miss the cards, I miss the communication. So I don't say anything. Which leads to the biggest crack in our foundation. I've shut down. I don't talk about my feelings, I don't talk about my needs, I just don't talk. I don't tell him how I feel. I don't tell him what I need, I don't tell him what I want. There are a lot of reasons. Many silly and foolish!

I know it, I see it happening. I don't know how to fix it...and I want to. I want US back, the open honesty, the trust, the BDSM, the M/s, the DD. I need those things to be me. And without me, there can be no us.